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Текст: Weird Al Yankovic. The Food Album. Fat.

Your butt is wide, well mine is too
Just watch your mouth or I'll sit on you
The word is out, better treat me right
'Cause I'm the king of cellulite
Ham on, ham on, ham on whole wheat, all right

My zippers bust, my buckles break
I'm too much man for you to take
The pavement cracks when I fall down
I've got more chins than Chinatown

Well, I've never used a phone booth
And I've never seen my toes
When I'm goin' to the movies
I take up seven rows

Because I'm fat, I'm fat, come on
(Fat, fat, really, really fat)
You know I'm fat, I'm fat, you know it
(Fat, fat, really, really fat)
You know I'm fat, I'm fat, come on, you know
(Fat, fat, really, really fat)

Don't ya call me pudgy, portly or stout
Just now tell me once again, who?s fat?

When I walk out to get my mail
It measures on the Richter scale
Down at the beach, I'm a lucky man
I'm the only one who gets a tan
If I have one more pie a la mode
I'm gonna need my own ZIP code

When you're only havin' seconds
I'm havin' twenty thirds
When I go to get my shoes shined
I gotta take their word

Because I'm fat, I'm fat, come on
(Fat, fat, really, really fat)
You know I'm fat, I'm fat, you know it
(Fat, fat, really, really fat)
You know I'm fat, I'm fat, you know it, you know
(Fat, fat, really, really fat)

And my shadow weighs forty-two pounds
Lemme tell you once again, who's fat

If you see me comin' your way
Better give me plenty space
If I tell you that I'm hungry
Then won't you feed my face

Because I'm fat, I'm fat, come on
(Fat, fat, really, really fat)
You know I'm fat, I'm fat, you know it
(Fat, fat, really, really fat)
You know I'm fat, I'm fat, you know it, you know
(Fat, fat, really, really fat)

When I sit around the house
I really sit around the house

You know I'm fat, I'm fat, come on
(Fat, fat, really, really fat)
You know I'm fat, I'm fat, you know it, you know it
(Fat, fat, really, really fat)
You know, you know, you know, come on
(Fat, fat, really, really fat)

And you know all by myself I?m a crowd
Lemme tell you once again

You know I'm huge, I'm fat, you know it
(Fat, fat, really, really fat)
You know I'm fat, you know
(Fat, fat, really, really fat)
You know I'm fat, I'm fat, you know it, you know
(Fat, fat, really, really fat)

And the whole world knows I'm fat and I'm proud
Just tell me once again, who?s fat